One of the subjects I used to teach undergraduates many years ago was Human Communication. It was one of my favourite subjects to teach.
I loved it because it was the study of how people communicate with each other, taking into consideration the context of different cultures, languages and beliefs.
A core principal of good human communication is to understand that there are many different people in the world. And being different doesn't mean being wrong.
In fact, it is important that we never judge people based on their culture because culture is never wrong.
Vietnamese and Koreans enjoy eating dog meat and it is considered a traditional dish. But most Americans would find it wrong to eat an animal that is normally a pet. Who is right or wrong?
It is a norm in Chinese culture (and many Asian cultures) to have the extended family all living in one house together. But in Europe, this is not accepted as children are suppose to leave the nest when they grow up.
Right? Wrong?
And now that the world is getting smaller, people are more exposed to different cultures and clashes start happening. It's not wrong to have these clashes.
People just need to be understanding and open-minded. But of course there are cultural practices, after being compared with others, come out as totally wrong.
And through education, these are slowly expected to disappear.
For example, many indigenous tribes in Borneo practiced head-hunting a long time ago. Now that everyone is more educated and 'civilised', the practice has been totally wiped out. Which is a good thing.
Genital mutilation may be the norm in some African cultures but with more knowledge, campaigns are now being conducted to educate the people so they know that it is not a good thing to do.
But one thing that cannot be done is to blame these people for their tradition and culture. It is what they've been doing for generations without thinking it is wrong. It's the way they are wired to think.
But of course, the key word is education.
With more clashes of culture happening, the more our minds are exposed and opened up. We get to see things from many perspectives. And that will eventually cause the entire human race to progress and evolve.
Now what am I actually getting at?
It's quite obvious I'm going to relate all of this to the Malaysian couple, Azizul Raheem Awaluddin and Shalwati Nurshal, detained in Sweden for allegedly abusing their children.
In Malaysia, light smacking and even pinching is accepted as forms of punishment and discipline for young children.
As long as it isn't to the extreme of causing serious hurt to the child and is done with the intention of teaching him or her a lesson. (A quick disclaimer here. I come from a family that does not believe in any form of corporal punishment and I have never, or ever will, hit my daughter no matter how lightly. But I am willing to accept the moderate ways of other Malaysians!)
In Sweden however, smacking or hitting children is not accepted at all. They even outlawed it in an act in 1979.
In fact, even screaming at a child in public is something that is frowned upon. It's just their culture.
So what happens now when Malaysian parents who are living in Sweden take to disciplining their children the Malaysian way?
In Malaysia, it isn't wrong. But in Sweden, it is. An obvious clash of culture, isn't it?
What should have been done? Should the parents have just adopted Swedish culture because they are in Sweden? Or should the Swedes be more understanding of Malaysian culture?
Things get more complicated because there is also the law involved.
If a Swede was caught smuggling drugs in Malaysia, he would be sentenced to death. Malaysia would not negotiate since the law was broken within it's borders.
So should the Swedes also entertain any attempts of negotiations by Malaysia when it comes to the case of Azizul and Shalwati?
Technically, they shouldn't.
But as Malaysians, we would think that way since that is how it has been practiced here for generations and we have been wired to think that it isn't wrong. And vice versa for the Swedes.
It's definitely a tough call to make.
However, all I can say for now is that I'm glad their four children are now back safely in the custody of their relatives rather than get lost in a social welfare foster system that practices an entirely different culture.
Zan Azlee
Thu Feb 06 2014
Picture for illustration purposes only
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